When Auntie fucks up

Weekend Cereal Date with the Cuties.

 

I was super late .. and Olivia was waiting for me a long long time.. she called me twice and asked where was I. Guilty as charged.

I need to work on that, especially with kiddos, I can’t bear to break their little hearts. But I brought my make up bag ( we have been playing pretend make-up for a while now ). So she got the chance to play with real make up this time, and she was delighted. I also gave her my perfume as apology to her, for being late. She was of course delighted.

 

Here, she’s pissed as fuck with me, she can’t even look at me. I’m terrible,

The boy has FINALLY warmed up with me after 2.5 years. David knows my name now, and he reaches out to me instead of the other way around. It took him 2.5 years. TWO POINT FIVE YEARS DEAR LORD.

Flower Dinner

Skype conversations :

I was speaking to Olivia and then i said, Ok, i need to eat now.. and i showed her my dinner ( Corn, two eggs, beetroot dip on a bed of vegetables )

Olivia : Wow, your dinner looks so beautiful.. Its a flower dinner…

Me : *impressed – and feeling a little grateful because my dinners really, looks kind of pretty* Ya.. its pretty isn’t it.. Shall we have dinner soon, we can have flower dinner together.

Olivia: When you get married, can I be your flower girl ? I want to throw flowers on the flower and you… Its so beautiful

Me : Yes of course, you and David can be the flower girl and boy.

 

and then she said,

Love you. Bye.

 

They just amaze me, kids. They look at the world, with such eyes.

Pace yourself.

Today im going for yoga, because i need to concentrate on breathing for a bit.

I need some restoration today. You know;

We feel deeply for certain things and scenarios because we have principles we believe in, and it is how you have been wired. And each of us has different principles

If you see someone being treated like shit, and you just stood by and kept quiet, that’s who you are, that’s the principle you believe in. The principle is that, you think its ok for people to be treated badly, and it doesn’t bother you, and its not your business. Probably because you feel small in life, that you are insignificant, hence you immediately think that its ok for other people to feel that way too.

But for me, its not right.

And i miss Rachel so much. I have been thinking, what is so different, that it was so huge, for us to not speak to each other. What kind of love is so different that you can drive someone away. I don’t understand. But owh well, so many things i don’t understand in life. I still don’t understand how my dad died, i think i understand it, but it still makes my heart aches.

 

I have been busy, I have thought about this space.. didnt have the space and time to pen down my thoughts.

All i want to say is that, i am so grateful for everything in my life.

So so grateful. are you ?

Learn how to encourage people, and be genuinely happy for them, learn to take yourself out of every situation, and be there for others.

 

I am happy, be happy for me.

Hurt people, hurt people.

Unhappy people create unhappy vibes.

 

Conversations with her

Today Olivia told me that, people die.

I think my brother has been teaching her about life and death. So when i met her, after exchanging lines of how much we missed each other. She told me, someday we will die. Most likely Mama (my mom) will be next to die. I understand her concept.

So then i said, thats right, normally the oldest people die first, but sometimes, just sometimes , Olivia or me, or her daddy can die first, which ever one God loves more and wants back.

She was Nooooooooo, Mama is going to die first. Haha, too cute. So i said yes, yes, let’s follow what you said. Mama will be the next to die.

 

2)

 

At Chinese New Year, i was preparing food for my family.

So i couldn’t play with her or colour with her. So she hung out around the kitchen because that’s where all the ladies were. She’s very curious and just loves helping around.

So we were all preparing garlic, just peeling them. And we sat her down and taught her how to do it. She was very patient, she sat there and just looked, observed and followed suit.

After a while she said ” This needs alot of patience, it is not easy “. I am impressed.

And when she finished the assigned number of garlic, she clapped her hands.

 

This little lady, what a joy to be around with.

 

Mac D

I never really eat Mac Donald’s. I adore their coned ice creams; it’s cheap; it’s the best; creamiest vanilla ice cream around.

Growing up as a kid; parents would take us to the mall now and then. We were poor people; getting a meal in MAC d is like what… once a year ?

On good days; we get the ice cream. Brothers and I would be delighted just to get the ice cream; back then was like; maybe 50 cents a cone.

You know kids love ice creams; and when we wanted them and parents just didn’t have enough money to get it for us. Was like; whyyyy ? , but I want.

 

Now; I’m an adult; I can easily afford as many ice creams I want. I’m humbled by my parents financial struggles; and the problem they have had just having us and dealing with not enough money. I think that’s the worst kind of problem anyone can have; just trying to survive.

These days my problem is that; my parcel is not here quick enough; which dress to buy; I stand before the aisle full of choices; I’m able to pay for anything I want but I can’t decide. Which country should I visit; Which job to pick; being ghosted by men; which restaurants to choose; I’m complaining because I need to queue to buy food; the cab fare is 3X if it’s usual. These are problems; but such problems. I am beyond grateful for the journey; from where I was to where I am. I am so blessed. Entirely blessed.