One of the exercise that I have been wanting to do for the longest time, is to look back, and understand how far i have come.
I constantly feel like the ground beneath me just sucks me right in, leaving me to struggle. A lot of time, as much as i whine, I would overcome situations and hardships. One of the hardest step is the struggle to accept it. People dont talk about struggles, and from social norm, we perceive that a life best lived is one is that of strive-free, free of trauma and tragedy.
So i want to list all the mile-stones that I have passed throughout my life.
Early Twenties : Grappling with money, went to uni and struggled to fit in. Graduated with a measly CGPA of 2.04. Broke up with my ex-bf of 6 years – something in me, just knew he wouldnt be able to take care of me.
Late Twenties : Partied a lot, Workplace – struggled to fit in. I think I was the healthiest during this timeframe, loads of running, hiking. Finding myself. Lost my beloved father, Lost myself. Forced to change my job, for a better paying job. Somehow i felt that with losing my father, i lost a lot of security and safety, be it financial, or emotional. I worked through my grief and struggled alot with my emotions, and felt very sad for an extended of time. Got promoted three times in Lazada, and headed to Singapore.
Early Thirties – Changed two more jobs in Singapore, earning money i would have never imagined. Working with people, and sitting at the table with C-level is nothing i have ever imagined. Someone without going to a great school (Harvard, Cambridge, Brown) or didn’t come from a family of influence. Somehow, here i am.
Walked away from someone who didn’t love himself or me. Got rid of unwanted people in my life. Got a Yoga Instructor Cert, Opened my own small scale pottery store. Learnt Surfing, Bought a bike, and fell of it multiple times – couldnt use my hands for 3 months and went through 2 years of rehab. Picked up Cello. Home Renovation. Bought my first Chanel outfit, bought multiple designer shoes. Yes i only have a pair of feet, but i need multiple shoes. Planning for retirement.
Visited 15 new countries in this age timeframe.
Somewhere in my mind, i know that this is an opportunity that i need to explore. It seems that im thrown into situation that would force me to learn about myself inside out.