Author: Vanessa Chua

I make thousands of choices everyday, for my future self, my current self. for the people around me, my family, my business, my team, my career. Nothing here is hard-wired, no achievement or outcome in my life, is due to how I am “hard-wired”. I set the tone how the day should be, to run…

I often wonder if i really love music, or its just a line i say to myself. I play the piano, and now, the cello. I am greatly moved by music, sometimes to tears. The vibration strikes a chord in me. When i hear a song, in my head – i hear the breakdown of…

One of the attributes that i often get praised for is for my relentless spirit – sometimes in a comparatively way. In a way that, it is a measurement how much im doing and the absence of it, in their life. Often in a way, that suggest that i have too much time, or am…

One of the exercise that I have been wanting to do for the longest time, is to look back, and understand how far i have come. I constantly feel like the ground beneath me just sucks me right in, leaving me to struggle. A lot of time, as much as i whine, I would overcome…

Today, i had a strong strong urge to exercise, i ignored. And like every other smart system, my body managed to bring myself to the yoga mat for a meditation session. While i was placing my mat on the floor, and gathered the tools… the meditation buckwheat pillow is a must, along with my favourite…

Its a Tuesday night, i want to pen down my thoughts, and everything I feel at this moment. I finally give in to myself. Choosing myself, at my on timing, giving myself the space and respect i deserve.   I quiet down my own mind, and told myself that I have already won. I have…

I have been feeling a little down lately due to a sexual harassment episode that happened at work. And i finally feel like i need to pen down my thoughts. Hard seems to be an understatement to what im going through. These past months, I’ve felt confused, stuck in time, sadness, anger, powerless, powerful, courageous,…

I will be the owner of a small quaint shop selling ceramics I will be a cellist – actively playing in an orchestra.. for retirement   Possible a large garden full of healthy greens to wake up to, just outside my master bedroom window, and a mini herb garden, and mangosteen tree. I will have…

30th September, is the 6th month mark since i started learning the cello.   Personally, i think I’ve done ok for the first 6 months. Still learning how to hold the cello, the finger placements, how long my end-pin should be, How much fingers i should be using, for both right and left hand, and…

I feel stuck. Fuck this shit.