Flower Dinner

Skype conversations :

I was speaking to Olivia and then i said, Ok, i need to eat now.. and i showed her my dinner ( Corn, two eggs, beetroot dip on a bed of vegetables )

Olivia : Wow, your dinner looks so┬ábeautiful.. Its a flower dinner…

Me : *impressed – and feeling a little grateful because my dinners really, looks kind of pretty* Ya.. its pretty isn’t it.. Shall we have dinner soon, we can have flower dinner together.

Olivia: When you get married, can I be your flower girl ? I want to throw flowers on the flower and you… Its so beautiful

Me : Yes of course, you and David can be the flower girl and boy.

 

and then she said,

Love you. Bye.

 

They just amaze me, kids. They look at the world, with such eyes.

Pace yourself.

Today im going for yoga, because i need to concentrate on breathing for a bit.

I need some restoration today. You know;

We feel deeply for certain things and scenarios because we have principles we believe in, and it is how you have been wired. And each of us has different principles

If you see someone being treated like shit, and you just stood by and kept quiet, that’s who you are, that’s the principle you believe in. The principle is that, you think its ok for people to be treated badly, and it doesn’t bother you, and its not your business. Probably because you feel small in life, that you are insignificant, hence you immediately think that its ok for other people to feel that way too.

But for me, its not right.

And i miss Rachel so much. I have been thinking, what is so different, that it was so huge, for us to not speak to each other. What kind of love is so different that you can drive someone away. I don’t understand. But owh well, so many things i don’t understand in life. I still don’t understand how my dad died, i think i understand it, but it still makes my heart aches.

 

I have been busy, I have thought about this space.. didnt have the space and time to pen down my thoughts.

All i want to say is that, i am so grateful for everything in my life.

So so grateful. are you ?